11.02.2004

My parents are going China for 10days. And i'll be a nanny for 10days! Nanny for who? MY 22YR-OLD SISTER! My parents put all the burden on me. Esp. my Dad. My sis's eyes do have problem. He kept reminding me for EVERY LITTLE THING. Things that are so trivia! I have to make sure she has her 3 meals everyday. Must cook for her lunch, buy dinner for her. When she boils water, make sure the windows are open. When she wants to wash clothes, must FIND clothes for her to wash. Don't leave her at home alone. Make sure she do this, make sure she don't do that. Even when i intend to go out for whole day, i have to bring her to my Aunt's home. Though my aunt lives near, i have to take the bus with her to my aunt's, cross the road, cross the road again, get on the FUCKING bus again, and get to my FUCKING destination. I have to make sure she doesn't get knocked down on the road. I have to cross the roads with her. If i can, i have to buy those bread with fillings for her breakfast. So my dad says, the best is, i stay at home. I feel like i have to stick after her ass for 24hrs. It'll be best if i don't go par tor, and that Bear come to my house. I'm really given this freaking heavy burden. I feel so stressed! And it got me angry. Yes, her eyes are not good. You know, partially blind pple can still cook a meal for themselves? they know how to look after themselves? She's not handicapped. She's alright. She can go downstairs and utter rubbish with AUnties every morning. SHE JUST CAN'T FUCKING TAKE CARE OF HER SELF. The older she gets, the more dependant she is. I cannot stand this. I'm really stressed up with this. If anything happens to her, it'll be my fault. But what can i do? compared to her, i'm stronger. I'm more independent. I'm supposed to be able to carry this whole thing. I don't want to take this. I know i sounded irresponsible. I'm trying hard to take it down. But she's really a difficult person. I can't stay at home with the person i wana hack every 10sec. I'll try hard. Really try. Guess Ted mite not be really happy. Sigh. Wana cry man. But can't let my parents see. They want me to take every shit from her, give in to her, serve her, take care of her. i can't let them know i'm feeling lousy. Arh..whatever. I felt like i'm going to lose my life for 10days. I just hope she won't be difficult with me. I'm at her mercy. Totally. If she decides to get into an accident, then i'll be so dead. Deader than those lying in the cemetries. I really hope Ted can understand this. As in, i have my obligations. I'm complaining alright. Well, it may seem nuthin to u people, but wait till u live with her. SIGH. Complainy nanny. I'll try to look at it in a more positive way. Now tt all's out, i feel better. Wait for more episodes of Ninniee the nanny coming up this week!


ninnnnniee bitChed madly at 12:19 AM